I took a bit of flack on that last post, apparently I’ve gone too far since some things are meant to be private. I cannot stay quiet on this, I believe that secrets are usually bad things. Good things are surprises, unexpected pleasantries, happy things. Secrets are usually dark things, things that make you feel ashamed or afraid, weak or powerless, and there is nothing happy about them.
Abusive relationships are usually full of secrets, whatever the relationship, elder, child-parent, partner, lover, friend, peer or even stranger and regardless of the abuse, be it physical, sexual or emotional in real time or online. All abuse causes pain. I believe that by outing abuse, you make people aware that it is not okay to be treated this way, every human person has the right to be treated with dignity and respect, without fear and abuse, regardless of race, gender, age, sexual orientation, religion and the list goes on. You remove the blame and the stigma from the
victim survivor and eventually, with enough awareness, the hope is that no one will have to suffer abuse.
Mental Illness, until very recently, was something to be ashamed of, questioned, heavily drugged and maybe even institutionalized. It was considered a dirty little secret. Why for Christ sake? A heart attack isn’t a “dirty secret”, why should mental illness be? It’s an illness for crying out loud, don’t blame, find what works, and if that means talking to anyone and everyone then do so. If that means blogging about Bi-Polar disorder while you check every site you can find then so be it. If you have a diagnosis you take every opportunity to learn everything you can from everyone you can because there is no definitive symptom, behaviour or treatment, you try everything you learn about it and if it doesn’t work you try something else. You can never speak to too many people or get too much feedback on something you are trying to navigate and they are experienced with. Why does it have to be a secret when any snippet of advice could be of help.
As for education. Why is a child who does not know how to learn the way she is taught, not taught in a different way? I know, the teachers have a curiculum to follow and a certain number of days to get through it, a large body of students and very little one on one time, but picture this – the child who is away sick for months and falls behind in school work when she already needed help before she became ill. When she goes back she is now so far behind and the more time goes on the more behind she gets and then she begins to feel stupid. What is more horrible than being unable to “get” something your peers easily understand. Months of trying gets the child further and further behind, she is pulled from class more often to do catchup work, she feels even more stupid and is now also teased by other classmates. She becomes so anxious that she can no longer face even going to school. The child is not stupid, far from it, she can give every single relevent detail in the lifecycle of a bull shark versus a hammer head shark. She can explain in grueling detail, complex plots in long works of fantasy fiction. She can give you a plot synopsis on any book or character in a book that she’s read in probably the last six months. However, she doesn’t get math, and therefore, well obviously glossed over that part in science where the cells divide. Why would a learning assessment be such a difficult thing to arrange? How about attempting to discern if a learning disability or difficulty, dyslexia perhaps, exists when the child is continuously unable to learn after an extented period of time. How about instead of trying to focus on getting the child to school, we focus on getting the child an education.
My question is, are my main topics, abuse, mental illness and access to education, things that should be kept secret in any way?
I want your feedback on this. Have I really ‘gone too far’?